KNOTS
by R.D. Laing

 
 
 


 

It is the duty of children to respect their parents

And it is the duty of parents to teach their children

to respect them,

by setting them a good example.

 

Parents who do not set their children a good example

don’t deserve respect.

If we do set them a good example

we believe they will grow up to be grateful to us

when they become parents themselves.

 

If he is cheeky

he doesn’t respect you

for not punishing him

for not respecting you

 

You shouldn’t spoil a child.

It’s the easy way, to do what they want

but they won’t respect you for letting them get away

with it when they grow up.

 

He won’t respect you

if you don’t punish him

for not respecting you.

 


 

My mother loves me.

I feel good.

I feel good because she loves me.

 

I am good because I feel good

I feel good because I am good

My mother loves me because I am good.

 

My mother does not love me.

I feel bad.

I feel bad because she does not love me

I am bad because I feel bad

I feel bad because I am bad

I am bad because she does not love me

She does not love me because I am bad.

 


 

I don’t feel good

therefore I am bad

therefore no one loves me.

 

I feel good

therefore I am good

therefore everyone loves me.

 

I am good

You do not love me

therefore you are bad. So I do not love you.

 

I am good

You love me

therefore you are good. So I love you.

 

I am bad

You love me

therefore you are bad.

 


 

Mother loves me

because she is good

I am bad, to think she is bad

therefore if I am good

she is good

and loves me

because I am good

to know she is good.

 

I am bad

to doubt she punishes me for doubting

she loves me by punishing me

for doubting she loves me.

 

She says

it must be her fault

if I doubt she loves me.

 

She feels bad because

I don’t think she loves me because

she feels bad when I don’t think she loves me.

 

She feels

it is her fault

that I can be so cruel

as to doubt she loves me

when she makes me feel cruel,

to think she tries to make me feel cruel.

 


 

To be kind is good. To be cruel is bad.

 

It is bad to feel mother is cruel to me, and hence bad.

 

Mother is cruel to me

but she is only being cruel to be kind

because I thought she was cruel when

she was cruel

in punishing me

because I was cruel to her

to think she was cruel to me

for punishing me

for thinking she was cruel

for punishing me for thinking.....

 

You are cruel

to make me feel bad to think

I am cruel to make you feel cruel

by my feeling bad that you can be so cruel as to think

I don’t love you, when you know I do.

 

If you don’t know I do there must be something the matter

with you.

 

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